Poetry of My Very Trying Day

Poetry of my Very Trying Day

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Comments (25)

  1. cannonfodder

    Nice! Made me think.

    March 10, 2017
    1. Nightbane

      Little boxes of stuff stored by another for nearly half a century will give one cause for pause

      March 10, 2017
  2. Bettymom

    How sad and lovely. But you aren’t yet old, my dear man.

    March 10, 2017
    1. Nightbane

      you, dear lady, are the eternal optimist.

      March 10, 2017
      1. Bettymom

        Perhaps not quite eternal.

        March 10, 2017
  3. shadow-storm

    This tired yet youngish soul feels for yours-
    today had to fill out medical forms
    and had to face harsh truth once more
    Exactly what curse cut a most beloved life short…
    C’est la vie, et il y a trop de déjà morte…

    March 10, 2017
    1. Nightbane

      bureaucracy is a right cunt, no? still, gives us summat to do while we wait.

      March 10, 2017
  4. EyeVey

    Today is the anniversary of my Dad’s passing. This touched my heart.

    March 10, 2017
    1. Nightbane

      cyber – hug

      March 10, 2017
  5. SEC

    In reverence peruse the leavings
    That like crumbs can lead us back
    Back in time to see from whence we came
    From whence we stepped to where we stand

    March 10, 2017
    1. Nightbane

      Was actually stuff collected by me late colleague. I wasn’t able to clean out the flat I’d been in at the time I went to work for him, he’d seen to it the personal stuff had been collected. The rest are later additions by him such as the telegrams with dubious messages had one not known of what I spoke, some quite hysterical even knowing the subject matter. he added things later, mostly collected when I was required to leave a place on very short notice, some of it when the job had run far too long or seemed to have ended badly and I’d managed to let him know I was alive and working. Most of the letters have naught to do with romantic matters, they are what he’d have said to me had I walked in the office after being presumed dead for months instead of him having got a postcard saying I was going to be a bit late and no to wait up for me.
      Last one is dated two yeas after I retired, speaks of a project gone very badly and wishing I was still on the active list to help him sort what had gone so terribly wrong.
      I’d no idea he’d kept this stuff all these years. had the box merely contained me personal stuff I would have been stunned when i received it. To find additions and his letters in it was almost incredible.

      March 10, 2017
      1. SEC

        It is indeed fantastic what others deem of value from our dealings.

        March 10, 2017
        1. Nightbane

          Is a very strange gift, letters are a person speaking to you. He’d writ them over the many years we worked together. They arent’ work related by half, he seems to have writ me sometimes on things he’d noted or wondered about me or could not say in professional atmosphere. It is as if I’d been paused during long conversations and am just now resumed with the backlog before me. There are five boxes of them, the sort in which the reams of his office paper came. The oldest of them, which was the one disintegrated, was the very same one he’d had me fetch for him the first day I was there. He’d had me collect a few piles of paperwork and the fresh box of HIS office paper ahead of presenting meself that day. I took all up, he bid me be seated, put the other stuff on his desk and opened the paper with near reverence. When I saw it, I understood why, he had exquisite taste in paper. I remarked what lovely stuff it was, he seemed surprised others still appreciated good paper. As per custom, he wrote the date he’d received the paper on the box and had me sign beneath to indicated who’d brought it up.
          When I saw that box, I had to pick it up in me hands and look at it, could not credit it was the very same box. It came apart and some of the contents avalanched across the table. The first letter is short a shingle sheet with two handwrit paragraphs, it begins:
          " Of all the things I’d learnt or surmised about you thus far, that you know fine stationery was not among them. You realise I shall now have to learn whence came that most unlikely regard? "
          I am eternally grateful he had the habit of dating every page he ever writ.

          March 10, 2017
          1. SEC

            that is a gift indeed

            March 10, 2017
            1. Nightbane

              still laffin at pilot wondering what I’d done to be cursed with decades of memos from the boss.

              March 10, 2017
            2. SEC

              little did he know

              March 10, 2017
            3. Nightbane

              He was there. I handed him the first one, he read it looked up astonished, said our late colleague had wondered that aloud to him as they awaited me return from a short assignment that afternoon. Then he said perhaps pilot would find out, I was being assigned to him. It took pilot most of a week to hit on asking his secretary if she had sufficient supplies. She indicated she did not, he ascertained paper was among the deficits, he directed me to fetch what she preferred. his wording was careful, it left us free to deviate form the previous b super basics. She preferred a specific sort of file folders and " anything but this rot, please, " in regards to paper. I wondered if she liked our late colleague’s she said she did but it didn’t take ditto fluid well. I thought to ask her for what she used paper. It became clear she needed two types so I went with what she’d said in mind and had the supply clerk show me paper. I found paper for the ditto machine, learnt there were colours and took her back a sheet of each alng with a partial box of plain white. Then I asked for paper suitable for writing AND typing upon that was some meduim between the el cheapo and my late colleague’s. The clerk was intrigued, stopped looking sleepy, brought me back into the warehouse ans showed me a looooong shelf with all sorts of better paper. most wasn’t in larger quantities and much of it hd been there a longish time. the far end held a very large quantity of nice stuff in medium weight he said took both pen and ribbon quite well. it also wasn’t bleach and optically brightened, was the most delicate tan. i treid different inks from pens and typewriters, took her that and four plain sheets for approval. He noted this stuff was a currently available item if it was well received where much fo the shorts lots werent’ now. I got the rest of her list except ink, told him I’d return anon. secretary was delighted, liked the paper, asked for some colour ditto paper and another full box of the white I’d selected, asked burnt umber ink in pens and typewriter ribbons.
              Pilot noted progress, was present when I returned from second nice visit to supply clerk. He’d asked her if she was satisfied with what i’d brought her, she said yes and showed him the differences. he was remarking he’d not known there was so much to know about paper as I came out of the stairwell, asked me how I’d learnt about.
              There is a letter next morning from late colleague. The majority is another matter altogether but he remarks at the end he regretted he could not meet her, would enjoy looking for what it was in me might have come of her.

              March 10, 2017
  6. noahbody

    Very well done! Yet you are only as old as you feel.

    March 10, 2017
    1. Nightbane

      I’m not at all young as it is and today I feel positively ancient.
      I thank you.

      March 10, 2017
      1. noahbody

        March 11, 2017
  7. funfreak

    Hmmmm…. that’s funny (not ha ha funny, but odd funny). When I look at my memories I see a life that was dictated by rules, religion, social proprieties, limitations on opportunities, and my own expectations. Time and experiences have freed me of a lot of that nonsense. It’s easy for me to put my memories and treasures into perspective. And…..from your presence here, I would suggest that you are rather timeless….you seem to easily navigate through cultures and decades. Just my observation.

    March 10, 2017
    1. Nightbane

      Hello, dear lady! You may wish to see me reply to SEC on this, it may clarify te perspective in which I got that little box of the history.

      March 10, 2017
  8. scarletts_letters

    I have a small wooden (Chocolate) box that was a present from the very first boy I felt something from that was well beyond my control. It smells – still – of that wood, the chocolate smell lasted only a small window. In that box are the photos – the hand full – of my life before, and the small significant things since. Similar things to what you describe, a feather, love letters (yes young people do know what and how they are done) trinkets, some cheap jewelry, stones and some things my dad gave me. That box has the gravity of a collapsed star, I am aware of its presence even when I don’t look at it, every object I can recall in terrible (but good) detail, if there is magic in the world this is my box of talismen (sp?).
    I am often moved to burn some parts of it to the dark god that hovers over me but it is sometimes like looking into the jaws of the dark, a game, a test to remember not only who I am, was, but that I am not one thing but many. These things live in two worlds and can never truly fade until we forget them. I felt old at 8 that never left me, this then is the gravity I mentioned.

    March 13, 2017
    1. Nightbane

      correct in the pplural, talisman is the singular.
      ~
      one must be young to write love letters, notwithstanding having had birthdays thrice that of any person deemed young.
      ~
      He answered every query I recall making in these " love " letters. Is amazing to read, particularly one I recall asking and he said only save it for another time. That was his particular euphemism for " cant’ discuss it with you at this time, is not within your purview to know. "
      There were queries I put a second time( some of them many, many times) and got an answer.
      He sometimes answered rhetorical questions.
      I put questions to him rapid fire.
      He also had the Tangential Mind.
      He wrote me FIVE REAMS of those " love letters " over thirty odd years… His legacy to me is to finally hear the other half of the conversation.

      March 14, 2017
      1. scarletts_letters

        Isn’t it a terrible but beautiful thing to be human, to be alive, to feel those tendrils pull at your heart from long ago. Even through the small pangs of regret I like those feelings, to know I meant so much to someone else. Even that want which I am no stranger to – there should be a word like melancholia for the description of how arousal becomes dull – even despite that I feel so profoundly for that time. Simple words, younger words that look so clumsy but is there anything as lovely. I get it, but scraps not reams, now that is truly a gem of emotion. I envy.

        March 17, 2017